You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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