She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Randomize
