Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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