Christians are straight up FREAKS
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Randomize
