The maid of honor just puked.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize
