suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
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