I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
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