Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
