Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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