I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
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