; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
