we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
