Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
