My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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