I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Randomize
