One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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