how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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