Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
My vagina is officially offended.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
