You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
