Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
