Me too!
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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