oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
