You made me cry and you don't even care
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
