DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
