Apparently you make a good broom.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
