I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
