Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize