I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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