Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Randomize
