Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I still have a little drunk in my system
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize