Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
We just shotgunned beers for America
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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