Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
