So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
