so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
