Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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