I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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