But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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