I feel like I'm in dance class right now
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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