so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
