You're so nebulous sometimes
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
