ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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