During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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