I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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