We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize