Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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