so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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