shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
