it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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