I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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