we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
We had to coat check the pizza.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
